


against the wind

by rainbowinthesky



Series: only a matter of time [2]
Category: Formula 1 RPF
Genre: Age Difference, Anal Sex, First Time, M/M, Masturbation, Pining, Time Travel, Waiting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-17
Updated: 2021-01-17
Packaged: 2021-03-14 03:15:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 16,487
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28788579
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rainbowinthesky/pseuds/rainbowinthesky
Summary: Turkey 2006: After Kimi returned to 2020, Sebastian wakes up alone in bed. What’s next? Try his luck with the clueless Kimi from 2006 and risk messing up the timeline or wait 14 long years for the man who not only gave him the best night of his life, but also stole Seb’s heart in the process?
Relationships: Kimi Räikkönen/Sebastian Vettel
Series: only a matter of time [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2107998
Comments: 28
Kudos: 106





	against the wind

**Author's Note:**

> This is a companion piece to [carry me home](https://archiveofourown.org/works/28427571). This time it’s from Seb’s perspective, but it focuses more on the years in which he had to wait for it to be 2020. It goes without saying that if you haven’t read that one this will make zero sense. 
> 
> The response to carry me home was overwhelming. Thanks to all who have reached out to let me know what they thought of it. The story has a special place in my heart and when people said they wanted more in this universe, something told me I had to tell the story from Seb’s side.
> 
> As always, special and BIG thanks to my lovely friend **fanatic4f1** for editing, making suggestions, rewriting whole sentences because I was rambling too much and listening to all of my insecurities when I was about to give up. It’s thanks to her that I’ve grown to love this story as much as carry me home and that it even gets posted today. Thank you, Cami! 🥺💕
> 
> Also thanks to **CustardCreamies** for giving me the idea to include Seb’s first win for Ferrari and the smut scene that followed. 😂💕
> 
> Title inspired by the song [Against the wind](https://youtu.be/2vRsEC65NTA) by Bob Seger.
> 
> I hope you’ll enjoy this just as much as the original story. 💕

**08.28.06.** _Istanbul, Turkey._  
Waking up to the feeling that something is amiss and wrong is horrible as Seb is currently finding out. It had been one of the best nights of sleep he’s had in a while, but when he blinks his eyes open and misses the warm and firm body he’s felt against him the whole night, dread and panic starts to claim him.

_Where’s Kimi?_

For a moment he wonders if it’s all been a dream. But then he shifts to sit up and he immediately knows it wasn’t a dream at all. The ache he feels in his ass is proof enough. The bed is cold and Sebastian straight away knows Kimi has returned to his own timeline. He buries his head in his hands for a moment, an overwhelming mixture of excitement and sadness threatening to crush him. He really got fucked by Kimi Räikkönen last night, the man he’s been in love with for ages. Seeing him in his older form had shocked Sebastian greatly, but he had been instantly attracted to future Kimi. And apparently, the feeling had been entirely mutual.

Seb lets himself fall back onto the mattress, his head buried into his pillow as he reflects on the night before. God, Kimi had been so patient and loving with him and he had made Seb feel _so good_. Having Kimi inside him like that was everything he had hoped for and more. It was quite literally heaven as Kimi had made sure Seb saw the stars, the moon and the brightly glowing sun all at once.

But then reality comes crashing back as Seb wonders where Kimi is now. Has he really gone back to his own time in 2020? But he didn’t even say goodbye... There is so much he still wants to know and tell him. Seb feels his eyes fill with tears and as much as he tries to fight them, they quickly roll down on his cheeks as he sniffles quietly. Wiping away the tears furiously is a lost cause because once he allows them to fall, it’s like the dam broke and they just keep coming.

_What am I supposed to do now?_

Seb lets his misty eyes glide over the room in the hopes to find physical proof - and not just the feeling in his ass that makes him wince every time he moves - that Kimi from the future was actually here last night. There isn’t any and Seb deeply sighs, finally able to rub the tears from his face and stop sobbing for a moment. He should really get out of bed and take a shower maybe, though he instantly feels torn about that because he doesn’t want to wash away Kimi’s touch and scent. It’s like Kimi left his mark on him last night and Seb isn’t ready for that feeling to go away just yet.

As he gets out of bed and stands up - still completely naked from the night before - he gets a better view of the kitchen and his eyes widen when he sees the two plates left there from last night’s dinner. Sebastian’s heartbeat picks up as he walks over to the table, almost in disbelief but then it turns into utter relief, because thank god, _I have not gone mad, it really happened._ He wants to sit down and reminisce about last night but he is reminded that he’s still stark naked as he suddenly shivers and goosebumps break out on his arms and chest. He goes looking for his shorts and shirt and finds it carelessly thrown around the bed. Remembering that Kimi took those clothes off of him makes him shiver again, but this time with longing. He pushes the thoughts away as he dresses himself quickly, not caring he’s still filthy and probably stinking of sex. It gives him some sort of comfort and it feels like Kimi is still with him.

His flight back home is due soon, though, so he needs to hurry up. His parents who were with him this weekend will be waiting for him at the hotel where they stayed the night, next to the airport. Quickly collecting all of his belongings, he stuffs everything in his suitcase but then his eyes catch on something under the kitchen table. He bends down to pick it up and gasps as he sees what it is he’s holding in his hand.

_It’s Kimi’s cap._

The Alfa Romeo one he had worn and shown to Sebastian to prove that he was indeed from the future. A lump forms in his throat and new tears start flowing from his eyes as he clutches the cap close to him, bringing it to his face and deeply inhaling the scent of his lover.

*

He catches a glimpse of Kimi when he makes his way to the car that’s waiting to bring him to the airport. Future Kimi’s words from the night before ring in Seb’s head as he looks at Kimi now:

_“He’s perfectly fine. Probably drinking himself into a stupor by now.”_

Judging by Kimi’s big yawn as he stretches himself and his worn out look with dark circles under his eyes, his hair a wild mess on top of his head, future Kimi wasn’t far off with that prediction. Sebastian realizes he’s stopped moving, completely captured by the sight of this younger Kimi and wonders if he has any idea of what happened last night. But Seb shakes his head, the man is most definitely utterly clueless. Even if he did have any clue, he would have forgotten all about it immediately after drinking so much. Sebastian hesitates to hurry and finally get to the car, just glued to the sight of Kimi and never wanting to look away. He knows now how Kimi’s touch will feel once he’s older. How he moves on top of Sebastian and how he kisses with passion.

Sebastian’s heart just about stops beating when Kimi suddenly looks up and catches the young man staring at him. He looks surprised to see Seb there, one eyebrow raising a bit but then a slow smile starts to form on that handsome face, his lips quirking up as he raises one hand to wave at Seb. Not registering that he’s doing it, Sebastian is beaming back at him and waving a little too enthusiastically. But then his face falls and disappointment washes over him as someone comes to get Kimi and with one last smile, Kimi turns and disappears out of sight.

Leaving Sebastian alone. _Again._

~

**10.21.07.** _São Paulo, Brazil._  
It’s been a fantastic year for Sebastian so far - he started with being the official test driver for BMW Sauber and he got to drive his first F1 race in Indianapolis for the team when Robert Kubica crashed in the Canadian GP the race prior. And now he has made the move to the Toro Rosso team, getting to race every other weekend and he is absolutely over the moon for finally being an official Formula 1 driver.

He has worked so hard to get here and now more than ever he is glad he is a part of the F1 world because today is going to be very exciting. Or at least, Seb hopes it’s going to be. The battle for the world championship is going to end right here in São Paulo, in the very last race of the season. And it’s between Kimi, Lewis and Fernando but of course Seb knows who he is rooting for. It’s going to be a fierce fight between the three of them and Seb is so happy he will be there to witness it all happening.

He packs everything he needs for the day into his backpack and as he is about to walk out from his motorhome to the paddock he suddenly remembers he forgot something crucial. He rushes back inside and rummages through the hidden compartment of his suitcase. Finally finding the item he is looking for, Seb smiles at it as he holds it in his hands for a moment, stroking the fabric reverently between his fingers and then bringing it to his lips as he kisses it softly. He inhales deeply but the scent is unfortunately almost gone.

Since his encounter with Kimi from the future he brings the cap with him everywhere he goes. It’s the only touchable object he has that reminds him of that magical night and it’s become some sort of a lucky charm. He refuses to go anywhere without it, always hiding it in his suitcase or in his backpack.

Now that he’s got everything that he needs, he steps out and makes his way to the Toro Rosso garage, smiling softly as he thinks of Kimi.

*

Seeing Kimi up there, smiling and happy, makes Sebastian so proud. He has always known that Kimi could do big things and now he’s finally done it and became world champion. And with Ferrari of all teams… it’s a dream come true and Sebastian hopes one day he will get to do the same.

Since Seb is driving for Toro Rosso, he’s becoming a bit closer to Kimi. And it had been awkward at first, because Seb just didn’t know how to act around him. He remembers that after his encounter with future Kimi, he had been sleeping really bad for months. His dreams were filled with the memories of that night and they always ended with Seb waking up, feeling lonely as he cried and longed for Kimi so much it actually hurt. And having to face Kimi - this clueless and infuriatingly handsome version of him - was painful sometimes. He had been determined so many times to just tell Kimi everything, just to get it off his chest because bearing this secret on his own was and is still threatening to be too much sometimes. But every time Seb thinks he is confident enough, the moment he actually sees Kimi, he backs off because Kimi would never believe him and may think Seb is a total creep.

And he remembers future Kimi’s words all too well.

_“And what if I tell you all that I know and then it won’t ever happen because of that?”_

What if Seb messes up the whole timeline of everything that will ever happen in future Kimi’s universe by telling his own Kimi everything? Just thinking about this gives Seb a headache, so he focuses his attention back at the man on the podium, watching him with a soft smile on his face.

Afterwards, he gets to congratulate Kimi and the Finn pulls him into a tight hug as Sebastian joyfully says, “well done, Kimi, congratulations!”

Kimi wraps his arms around his back and buries his face in the crook of Seb’s neck, making the younger man’s breath stutter in his throat as he feels the Finn whisper against his skin.

“Thanks Seb.”

~

**09.14.08.** _Monza, Italy._  
“No!” Kimi yells as his badminton racket misses the shuttlecock by a hair. Sebastian laughs loudly, earning him a glare from the Finn.

“You are such a sore loser, Kimi.”

Kimi just grumbles, this time missing the shuttlecock as he goes to serve, resulting in a fault. It only makes Seb laugh harder at his frowning face.

“If you keep laughing, I won’t play against you anymore,” Kimi warns and that of course shuts Seb right up. He enjoys playing badminton with Kimi far too much for them to stop doing it. Before they started battling each other, he had known very little about the game, only that you needed a racket and shuttlecock. When he was younger, Seb had played it mostly on the beach in Renesse where his family would go on holidays, but that had been all for fun and without any of the rules. And over the last couple of races he had spied on Kimi playing the game a lot and being very fanatic about it. Mark Arnall had seen Seb watching them play once and invited him over to join in, too. Seb did so with enthusiasm, but both Mark and Kimi absolutely killed him and Seb had gone home, knowing he had to up his game. He had studied the game endlessly, practiced a lot with his sisters and now here he is, showing Kimi how much he has improved and he’s pleased that the Finn is so surprised and frustrated with it, to the point he is making needless faults.

When Seb aces again, Kimi just stops and looks at him for a while - a hand in his side and the other playing with the racket - completely floored.

“When did you get so good? Just... _how_?!” he asks, an octave higher than usual.

“I practiced a lot after last time,” Seb says cheekily, his heart skipping beats because Kimi looks just so impressed. It’s a good thing Sebastian is already flushed from the exercise so Kimi would not notice his blushing as the Finn studies him intensely. Seb has to fight the urge to squirm where he stands or look away from those piercing eyes and lets Kimi just look at him. He wonders what he is thinking and his mind drifts to what future Kimi had told him when the younger man asked if he had ever thought about wanting to be together with Seb.

_“Yes Sebastian, I wanted to,”_ had been his answer. And Seb remembers being so elated and excited by the confession, blushing furiously but the lust and desire had won over his shyness. Future Kimi had never specified when or how he had wanted Seb over the years though. Seb wishes he had pressed a little more on that issue. The unknown is killing him.

Maybe this is one of those instances where Kimi wants to be more than friends? He must find out later, because now he is summoned to prepare for the race.

*

He, Sebastian Vettel, has won a F1 race in Monza of all places! As if driving in the elite sport isn’t enough, Sebastian has managed to win in front of all the tifosi. He still can’t believe it! It had been surreal to be on that podium as the number 1 for the day and to hear the German anthem, which was later followed by the Italian one, being played for him for the very first time. Of course he had hoped he could achieve something in Formula One, but he’s still so young so he had not expected it to be this soon. He can’t stop beaming and the smile is there to stay on his face all day, he is sure of it.

He’s whistling in his motorhome as he freshens himself up a little and to just breathe for a while and calm the adrenaline that doesn’t seem to stop rushing through his body. He’s just about to step outside when there’s a knock on his door. He opens it and is immediately greeted by a lopsidedly grinning Kimi Räikkönen.

All Seb can do for a frozen moment is just stare dumbly at that happy face before he gets pulled into a hug, his heart beating faster at the way Kimi holds him, so tight and secure. When Kimi pulls back, Seb could swear the Finn is staring at his lips and the German’s heart beat picks up again. Should he try for something? Or leave it be? Wait for Kimi to make the first move? Should anyone make a move at all? Because future Kimi said nothing ever happened between them... so it feels like messing up the timeline if either one of them makes the first move. But then again, Seb can’t bear the thought of having to wait until 2020 to question Kimi. And what if future Kimi only wanted this young version of Seb and not the man he will be in 12 years time? Or what if future Kimi has a girlfriend or even worse, a boyfriend? He can’t stand the thought of Kimi with another man that isn’t him. Ugh, it’s all so confusing and Seb absolutely hates the whole situation.

“Congrats, Seb,” Kimi mumbles.

“Thanks Kimi,” Seb smiles back. And then he thinks ‘ _fuck it_ and musters all the courage he has, asking as casually as he can, “what are you doing later this evening?”

Kimi’s gaze finally breaks from his lips and shifts to Seb’s eyes as a bright smile comes over his face.

“I got this girl’s phone number! I am taking her out tonight.”

The smile falls from his face for a moment as his heart breaks into a million pieces. Seb fights the urge to cry but he plasters a fake smile on his face and tells Kimi he’s happy for him. Kimi may have been completely oblivious about it, not realizing how much his answer hurts Sebastian and how it will probably stain the happiness of his first win forever.

~

**08.30.09.** _Spa, Belgium._  
It’s been a little more than over three years since Sebastian’s strange but magical encounter with his older Kimi. There isn’t a day that goes by that Seb doesn’t think about it, even if it’s just for a fleeting moment. Today is no exception, but while the day had started with gloomy thoughts for Seb it has evolved to a beautiful day with him and Kimi ending up on the podium together for the very first time. And Seb isn’t able to keep his heart under control every time he looks at Kimi. The Finn looks absolutely gorgeous, his longer hair constantly falling into his eyes and every time he smiles Seb feels a little light headed.

After debriefing with his team, Seb rushes to go and see Kimi before he leaves. Even though the Finn had seemed happy to be on the podium, Seb could sense there was something off with him. He’d detected a souring mood afterwards and he’d not had the chance to ask Kimi what was wrong.

The door opens for Seb after he’s knocked on it and he can’t help but stare at what he sees, utterly entranced as Kimi stands there with only a towel wrapped around his waist and his hair dripping wet onto the floor and on his glistening chest. A drop rolls down from Kimi’s hair to his shoulder - right over a mole that Sebastian is suddenly very fascinated with - down to his chest and finally wanders down to his happy trail and disappears into the towel. Seb’s eyes are hungrily following them all and they get stuck on the sharp v-cut abs. Seb remembers them from three years ago and it had been his favorite feature of Kimi’s body then. It sends a thrill through the German to see them again and he really has to remind himself he’s not here to ogle at Kimi.

“Seb?” He’s rudely interrupted with his staring and he glances at Kimi’s face, who’s got an eyebrow raised at him as he towels his hair dry. “Are you going to come in, or what?”

Oh. _Right_. Seb closes the door behind him and follows Kimi into his motorhome. His suitcase is already packed and set to go.

“You’re leaving soon?”

“Yeah,” is all Seb gets back. It’s strange, Kimi is supposed to be happy but instead he’s all sombre and subdued. Seb doesn’t like it one bit, he wants Kimi happy and carefree, like he always is around Seb.

“What’s wrong?” Seb dares to ask, heart beating in his throat as he fears the answer. Kimi sighs and sits down on the couch, his towel shifting and revealing even more of his damp skin. Seb sits next to him, trying not to look at all the naked skin but focusing his eyes on Kimi’s face instead. When he sees Kimi frowning though, the younger man forgets all about his distracting body as he begins to worry. Something must be really wrong for Kimi to be this depressed.

“Kimi?”

Kimi looks up at him and sighs deeply. “Bwoah, Seb. It’s just Ferrari being shit,” he trails off.

“What did they do?”

“They are talking to Alonso behind my back and I think they are going to sign him and break my contract.”

Seb has heard the rumors, but naively he always trusts Ferrari to be fair and square and do the right thing. But what if Kimi was right? Where would he go then next year?

“But...” he says, still shocked from what Kimi has revealed. “Ferrari would never do that right?”

Kimi snorts self deprecatingly. “I haven’t had the best season, Seb.”

“But you have a contract until the end of 2010!” Seb almost yells, getting more and more worked up. Kimi just shrugs and doesn’t say anything else for a long moment. Seb watches him, feeling upset and miserable on behalf of Kimi. It’s not the way he wishes for Kimi’s adventure to end with the Italian brand. “So what are you going to do now?”

“I don’t know yet,” Kimi pauses, clearly thinking about it before he continues, “all I know is that I am not going to race for a team that’s not competitive.”

“But what if that means you won’t have a seat next year?” Seb asks, the fear creeping into his voice. It makes Kimi look up at him again and he looks a little lost as he answers Seb’s question.

“Then it means I won’t be here next year.”

Tears spring into Seb’s eyes as he fights against the terror that crawls inside his chest, making it hard to breath for a second.

“No,” he whispers, his voice trembling. “No Kimi, you can’t mean that.”

Kimi shrugs again as he stares at a spot on the wall, completely oblivious to Seb having a meltdown next to him. And Seb tries to hold his tears in, he really does, because he doesn’t want to add more to any of Kimi’s problems, but it’s almost impossible to stop them from falling. He sniffles quietly, angrily wiping the tears away as he hopes Kimi won’t see him crying, but it’s too late. The sounds of Seb’s sniffles are noticed by Kimi as he turns to Seb again.

“Seb?” he mumbles, looking worried. The Finn has such a soft look on his face. It makes Seb want to bury his face in the crook of his neck and hide there forever, searching for shelter against the wind.

“I don’t want you to leave,” Seb says, aware he’s sounding like a child having a tantrum, but he just needs Kimi to _know._ Needs him to know and understand how much he means to Seb and that he would be utterly lost without Kimi here. “Who will badminton with me if you aren’t here?”

Kimi lets out a surprised honest-to-god _giggle_ at the unexpected question. It lightens up the mood a little as Seb feels himself smile too, happy that he’s made Kimi laugh, even if it is at his own expense.

“I don’t know, but I’m sure you’ll find someone, Seb.” Kimi shakes his head, still smiling a little.

“I don’t want to find someone else,” Seb says meekly.

“We could play badminton when we’re both in Switzerland,” Kimi then suggests. It sounds like he has already made up his mind. Seb closes his eyes and nods. And then his eyes open wide again as he suddenly remembers what future Kimi had told him.

“What?” Kimi looks surprised to see Seb perking up a little, probably wondering why he looks somewhat relieved.

Seb dries his face with the hem of his shirt as he smiles still a little wetly at his friend.

“I am sure you’ll be back, Kimi.”

_Because you are still on the grid in 2020. You told me so yourself._

~

**11.14.10.** _Abu Dhabi, United Arab Emirates._  
 _“Where is the fun in knowing what and when things will happen? I want you to feel real authentic joy when you’re successful and also the deep lows when you’re not. It’s going to make those feelings all the more real, you know?”_

Sebastian remembers being so bummed out when Kimi had said that. But now more than ever he is glad that Kimi had kept his mouth shut and refused to tell Seb everything that was going to happen in the future. Because damn, the feeling that is coursing through him right now, along with the adrenaline, is overwhelming and exhilarating joy and it is quite literally the best feeling in the world. And honestly, he doesn’t know if he would have felt the same if he had known this was going to happen beforehand.

It has all been so unreal... from the moment he heard Rocky say _’you just wait sunshine, you just wait,’_ , to the _’du bist Weltmeister!’_ screamed into his ear... From his team engulfing him in hugs after he got out of the car to the podium itself... It’s crazy to think he’s only 23 years old - the youngest Formula 1 champion ever - and he’s already achieved everything he’s ever dreamed of in his life.

Sebastian is finally retreating to his motorhome very early in the morning after partying hard with the whole team and silence is ringing inside his head for the first time that day. The room spins pleasantly around him as he takes off his shoes and lets himself fall onto the soft mattress. But then his phone starts to buzz again, making Seb jump and sigh with irritation. Everyone is calling him and he understands and appreciates it, but now he just wants to be on his own and let everything sink in for a moment. Just as he is about to turn his phone off, he sees Kimi’s name flashing on the screen.

Immediately his heart starts to beat faster, elated that Kimi is calling him. He had been so busy the last couple of weeks, hell months even, he barely had any time to spare a thought for Kimi. His mind was occupied with only one thing and that was winning this title. And now that he finally has and Kimi is calling him, it’s like an immense feeling of _yearning_ for the older man is washing over him. It makes him stop for a moment, trying to swallow past emotions that bubble up before he answers the call. He feels like he’s about to fall to pieces after all that has happened today and Kimi calling him only adds up to it. Taking a deep breath, he gets up with the buzzing phone in hand and stumbles to his suitcase to get Kimi’s cap, wanting to have it close as he talks to Kimi.

“Hi Kimi,” he slurs as he finally picks up and finds the cap. _Oh_. Oops, he realizes that perhaps he has had a bit too much champagne and beer to drink and apparently it’s enough to compromise his speech.

“Hey champ,” Kimi responds. Seb hasn’t heard that hoarse voice in a long while and it sends shivers down his spine as he hears Kimi say those words softly into his ear. “Congratulations.”

“Thanks,” Seb smiles stupidly, very much like the love sick fool he is and he’s glad that Kimi can’t see him. He puts Kimi’s cap on his own head as he goes to lie down again.

“Really happy for you, Seb. You deserved this, you were so good.”

Seb feels his ears burning, Kimi praising him always does that to him, ever since that night. And now he can barely concentrate on what else Kimi is saying as his mind drifts to their encounter more than four years ago. More than anything he wishes he could go back to that night and the feeling of being wanted like that. Just remembering Kimi’s touch and his mouth on him is enough to arouse Seb into hardness. He catches himself just before his hand is about to wander to the bulge in his pants - he might be a little drunk but he’s not going to jerk off with Kimi still on the other end of the phone.

“Am I boring you?” Kimi chuckles and Seb realizes he must have only hummed in answer to what Kimi is telling him. He ought to stop his daydreaming right now and focus his attention back on Kimi. He doesn’t want Kimi to think he wants to get rid of him.

“No! No Kimi, of course not,” he rushes out. “You could never bore me! You know I love you!”

_’Oh shit’_. Seb starts to panic but his admission only makes Kimi chuckle louder, obviously just taking it as a friendly drunken love confession.

“Sure, Seb. Now go to sleep, sounds like you need it.”

Kimi sounds so ridiculously soft and sweet, like he’s just as in love as Seb is. And maybe he is, future Kimi had told him he’d always liked Seb. In this drunken state, Seb is almost ready to blurt it all out and beg for Kimi to believe him, but the older man is already saying his goodbyes and Seb’s courage deflates just as quickly as it came.

“Bye champion. Sleep well,” Kimi murmurs into his ear, hanging up before Seb can reply to him. Seb immediately turns his phone off and throws it on the bed carelessly as he lies down again. The call has left him all hot and bothered, thoughts of future Kimi and the Kimi he just spoke to possessing his mind. Now that he’s no longer on the phone with the Finn, he allows his hand to cup himself through his trousers and moans, throwing his head back and biting his lip as he feels how hard he is

The night with future Kimi had been featured in practically all of his wank sessions over the last four years. And there are so many details to choose from, Seb sometimes straight up has a hard time to make that choice. But tonight he thinks about Kimi’s cock. That gorgeous big dick that had made him feel so good. It’s enough to make him go fully hard and throbbing in his underwear in no time. Sebastian’s hand slips inside his pants as he palms himself and then he shoves his trousers and boxers just down enough to get his cock out. He wraps his fist around it and strokes it from tip to base as he bites his bottom lip and leans his head back against the pillow, exposing his throat and wishing Kimi was here to suck on the vulnerable skin.

Images of Kimi on his knees at the edge of that single bed fill behind his closed eyelids. He still blushes when he thinks of how fast he came once Kimi had wrapped his experienced mouth around him but the older man had been so sweet about it. And in the end it didn’t matter anyway because Kimi had him hard again in a few minutes, just by kissing him.

Feeling his erection throb with need, Sebastian swipes his thumb over the weeping head but his juices are not enough to really move comfortably over his dick. He leans over and grabs the lube he’s brought with him over at the nightstand and slicks up his cock with a generous amount. An obscene moan escapes Seb’s lips as he tightens his grip around himself, moving up and down as the slick sounds echo in his ear, much like the noises Kimi’s mouth had made when it moved skillfully over his cock.

Just like that night, even thinking about Kimi is sure to bring him close to orgasm in no time at all. He had gotten better at lasting longer over the years, but his drunken state and the level of horniness he feels for Kimi right now are not really helping. And Seb really doesn’t care, he just wants to come with filthy pictures of Kimi in his mind. The image shifts to himself on his knees on the bed, in front of Kimi and staring at the Finn’s cock. It was the first time he had seen another man’s cock erect and Sebastian remembers being so intimidated by it and at the same time he wanted to devour it.

As soon as he had gotten his lips around it and heard Kimi groan, Sebastian felt adrenaline rush through him and the need to please Kimi was so great he had almost choked himself on that cock. He had been so worried that Kimi would be turned off by Seb’s embarrassing inexperience but to his relief it only made Kimi all the more sweeter and maybe even more turned on? Seb still doesn’t know what went through Kimi’s head at that moment, all he knows is that Kimi had been the best teacher after that.

Sebastian’s hand starts to move faster over his cock, the memories of how Kimi had instructed him to suck his cock swirling in his mind and making his cock pulse in his grip. He is so close he can almost taste the sweet release. Wanting to come so bad, he knows exactly what will make him go over the edge instantly.

He can almost feel Kimi pulling on his hair as he thinks about it. The Finn had pulled Seb’s lips off from his cock and Seb could only stare dazedly back at him, aware his lips were probably obscenely swollen and drenched with spit. Kimi’s eyes had been dark with unconcealed desire when he had said,

_“You’ve got to stop, sweetheart.”_

And maybe it’s cheesy, but thinking about the endearment and Kimi saying it to him in that moment never, ever fails to make Seb come in shuddering breaths. He’s writhing in the sheets as he feels the orgasm wash over him, the word _sweetheart_ ringing in his mind over and over, making him tingle from head to toe. His back arches as he moans, with his cock twitching and blurting out thick ropes, soaking his fingers with his come.

Once his fuzzy mind clears a bit, Seb stares at the ceiling with a satisfied smile on his face. He doesn’t even think about cleaning himself up as he feels his eyes close, all the intense events of the day finally catching up on him as he falls asleep. The fact that he wakes up the next morning with Kimi’s cap all crooked over his eyes, a crusty hand and a dirty shirt doesn’t even sour his good mood.

~

**03.18.12.** _Melbourne, Australia._  
Happiness. That’s what Seb feels when he sees Kimi walk around in the paddock again, just where he belongs. Close to Seb. The familiar butterflies he always feels whenever he sees or thinks about Kimi are flying wildly in his belly, making him almost nauseous with it. Of course he had seen Kimi during his break from F1 but the meetings had been few and far between. He could count on one hand how many times they had met. It wasn’t like they didn’t want to see each other, far from it, but their schedules had clashed every time one of them suggested a date. It should have been easier since they live in the same country, especially after Seb had bought his house not that far from Kimi’s in Switzerland. But now that they have the same schedule again, Seb hopes they will be able to visit each other more in between races.

Just the thought of seeing Kimi regularly again makes Seb sigh with love. They have agreed to eat breakfast together and then play a round of badminton to relax before the race. Seb is waiting for Kimi to join him on one of the benches in the park next to the circuit. He spots Kimi walking towards him, the black of the Lotus uniform looking so good on him. Kimi’s face lights up when he sees Seb waiting for him. The sight of that happiness and knowing Seb is the source of it makes the German’s heart skip a few beats.

“Hey,” Kimi greets him with a dazzling smile as he sits down. He takes his sunglasses off and adjusts his cap so that the sun won’t shine in his eyes.

“Morning,” Seb replies with a smile just as bright. He squints a little because he forgot his sunglasses and cap in all his rushing and excitement to see Kimi.

Seb hands over a sandwich to Kimi from the paper bag he had brought with him and The Finn accepts it eagerly, his appetite as big as ever.

“Oh. You’ve got me one with salmon,” Kimi says, his eyes sparkling as he looks at Sebastian gratefully.

“Yeah, you like that right?”

Kimi nods and then takes a big bite from the sandwich. Seb watches him as the older man closes his eyes and moans at the taste. The sound is obscene and it’s exactly like it was six years ago, in that motorhome. It makes Seb flush uncontrollably and he wishes badly he hadn’t forgotten his sunglasses so he could hide his eyes because he is probably failing to conceal the desire that must be shining in them. But the Finn isn’t noticing anything at the moment though, he’s focused on his sandwich as if he’s never eaten anything better.

Seb watches him greedily eat with a mixture of amusement and want as the memory of them eating together pops into his mind. He had been so eager to please Kimi that he had made sure to find something he knew the older man would like as he had remembered reading somewhere that salmon was Kimi’s favorite. Seb had been ridiculously pleased when Kimi was practically devouring his meal, proud of himself that he’d picked the right dinner for them.

_“This is amazing_ ,” Kimi says and Seb’s heart just warms because that’s exactly what he said all those years ago too. Some things never change.

*

“Yes!” Seb yells and jumps as he beats Kimi again at their game of badminton. He has won two games in a row and easily at that. And Kimi is looking increasingly frustrated by not seeming to get it right, making avoidable errors and serving like crap.

“One more game?” Seb asks, grinning smugly. Kimi rolls his eyes at him and shakes his head no. “Aww, why not?”

“What’s the point?” Kimi replies, “I will just let you win again.”

“ _Let_ me win?!” Seb raises his voice a little, sounding incredulous and offended.

“Yep,” Kimi says seriously. “I didn’t want to hear you complain about losing again, so I let you win this time.”

“You are still such a sore loser, aren’t you, Kimi?” Seb huffs. “I won fair and square.”

The older man just raises a sceptical eyebrow at him and just as Seb wants to protest Kimi’s claim again, he realizes that the Finn is teasing him, trying to rile him up. And very much succeeding with it. He shoves Kimi as he starts to laugh. A smirk forms on the Finn’s face, clearly enjoying their interaction and it’s sure to bring a smile to Seb’s face for the rest of the day. He manages to get a podium place later that day and it’s great, but Seb loves the fact that Kimi is back even more.

~

**03.24.13.** _Selangor, Malaysia._  
Sebastian knows Mark is mad at him. Angry even. The Australian has made it more than clear, for everyone to know. But the thing is, Seb just doesn’t care. Not really. Sure he feels bad for Mark, but it isn’t Seb’s fault he didn’t win. He had honestly not heard Christian’s warning _’This is silly, Seb. Come on!’_ in his ear. He had just seen an opportunity to win and he took it. In his eyes, there’s nothing wrong with that. Every world champion would do the same, he is sure about that.

But now with everyone mad at him, he feels like he has to apologize. Because whether he likes it or not, he has to work with those people and he doesn’t like tension in the team. So he tries to approach Mark but he’s in no mood to listen. He only gets a murderous glare as Mark reminds him of, “Multi 21, Seb”. Right. There’s nothing Seb can do about that anymore.

After the podium and press conference in which he apologizes, the Australian disappears and Seb thinks it’s best to just let him be for a while. After the debrief and long talk with Christian, his happiness about the win has lessened by the minute.

It’s not until much later that Seb hears a knock on his hotel room door. He was just about to take a shower and he has already taken off his shirt. Not bothering to put it on again, he opens the door and is surprised to see Mark standing there. The Australian doesn’t say anything as he steps into the room without even asking if he’s allowed to. Seb has to take a step back to make room for him and sighs as he closes the door behind them.

“What are you doing here?” he asks, his voice not really kind. He’s not looking forward to fighting with Mark again to be honest. The man is a hothead and Seb’s mood has soured a lot in the last few hours, so he hopes Mark will say what he has to say soon and that he will leave after that.

“Just... what the fuck, Seb? I just don’t understand why you did that! The orders and plan were clear from the start and yet you still did that! Why?!”

The man is glaring daggers at him and while Seb is not afraid in the slightest, he does feel his heart rate pick up and has to admit Mark is a little bit intimidating when he’s angry. He refuses to show that though and he can’t help but pour a little gas on the already lit fire between them.

“I tried to apologize but you wouldn’t listen, Mark!” he pauses and then he adds, sneering, “it’s not my fault I am better than you.”

It’s entirely the wrong thing to say and Seb knows it’s mean, but it just infuriates him when Mark gets like this, not wanting to listen and always blaming Seb for everything. Just when he’s about to apologize, Mark is suddenly right in his face and he pins Seb against the wall. The Australian is all red and angry - Seb can practically see a vein throbbing in his forehead and _wow_ , it is actually kind of hot.

“Who the fuck do you think you are, kid?” Mark hisses, drops of spit hitting Seb’s face with the angry force of it. Seb knows it’s not a question that requires an answer, but a slow smirk forms on his face as he thinks of one anyway.

“I am the kid who made you the second driver in your own team and a three time world championship winner. What about you, Mark?”

The grip Mark has on Seb’s bicep is tightening and their eyes keep boring into each other. There’s a thick tension in the air and Sebastian first thinks it’s just Mark’s anger that is causing it, but it feels different now. The mood is shifting and Seb can’t really pinpoint what it is.

“You should have just stuck to the plan, Vettel,” Mark bites out as his eyes shift from Seb’s eyes to his lips and back.

“Why should I? Is this the only way you can win nowadays? If I keep my distan-”

Sebastian doesn’t get to finish his sentence, because suddenly Mark grabs him by the back of his neck and pulls the German’s face closer to his own, pressing their lips together roughly.

_Oh._

So that’s what that was earlier. It was sexual tension he could feel in the air. Well, he can’t deny he doesn’t enjoy the kiss. It’s so aggressive with their stubble scratching and rubbing together as Mark demands entrance into his mouth and Seb allows it for a moment. He has always thought Mark was quite attractive. And he knows that he could easily get Mark into his bed right now and get fucked really good.

But the thought of actually going through with this doesn’t feel right. If his encounter with Kimi from the future had not happened, he would have jumped into bed with Mark in a fucking heart beat. He would have had no problem in letting Mark pin and fuck him into the bed until his anger seemed to gradually fade away, but Seb just can’t do it. It would feel too much like he’s betraying Kimi. The thought of Kimi now makes him remember the man’s face when Seb had joked about fantasizing about Mark when he masturbated. The Finn had narrowed his eyes dangerously at him and Seb was quick to clarify that he was joking.

_“No, no, it’s not Mark. Of course it’s not Mark.”_

It’s a sobering memory, one that makes Seb pull back and shove Mark away from him.

“Mark,” he whispers, feeling bad when the Australian looks at him with confused and wild eyes.

“You want this too, right?!” Mark asks, anger still radiating off him, but there’s desperation there too as he tries to pull Seb in again for another kiss.

“No Mark,” Seb says gently as he puts his hands on Mark’s chest to prevent him from doing that, not feeling like fighting or pushing Mark anymore. “I don’t think this is a good idea.”

He wants to explain. Tell Mark why not. But how does he even begin to explain how he doesn’t think any other man will ever come close to what he experienced that night with Kimi?

“I am sorry, Mark,” Seb apologizes and it’s clear he’s not just talking about this.

Mark stares back at him in disbelief and Seb feels sorry for him. He shouldn’t have kissed back, put an end to this right when it started. He receives a glare and a heartfelt _”Fuck you, Vettel”_ as Mark storms out of the room, slamming the door behind him and leaving Seb more confused than ever.

In an effort to comfort himself a little, he gets Kimi’s cap from the hidden space of his suitcase and fiddles with it. Somehow the cap has become a symbol of good luck and it always calms Seb down when he needs it.

~

**03.29.15.** _Selangor, Malaysia._  
His first win for Ferrari is all consuming, the happiness and joy Sebastian feels as he crosses the finish line for Ferrari for the first time and wins the race for them is indescribable. As soon as he gets out of the car, he runs towards his team, his helmet still on as he hugs everyone and their exhilaration is only feeding his own bliss even more. He grabs one of the yellow Ferrari flags and jumps up and down as he waves it around in triumph, his joy radiating off of him. When the happiness threatens to overwhelm him, he has to take a moment and bends forward a little, his hands resting on his knees as he shakes his head in joyful disbelief.

Driving for Ferrari has been a lifelong dream and winning for them for the first time in only his second race in red is giving him this euphoric invincible feeling. The nineteen year old puppy he had been when he first started in F1 could have never imagined that this would happen. There is a lot that that young man would have never expected and it’s weird to realize that the Kimi from the future _had_ known but decided not to tell Sebastian a thing. And Seb is still very grateful for that.

The day he and Kimi became teammates had been one of the happiest in Seb’s life. Knowing that the older man was around all the time was sure to give Seb the familiar warm and fuzzy feelings he always had whenever Kimi was close. It’s a feeling he had become addicted to over the years, but he doesn’t mind being hooked on Kimi, not one bit.

What happens after the race is a bit of a blur, Seb lets it all just wash over him as he basks in the joy of winning. Once he comes down from the podium - still in disbelief the Italian anthem got played up there because _he_ won for Ferrari - he rushes to find Kimi and when he sees him, the Finn smiles broadly as he opens his arms for Seb to jump right into. Kimi’s arms wrap around him securely, squeezing him tight and Seb feels himself getting a bit emotional again. It only worsens as Kimi murmurs something in his ear.

“You were spectacular, Seb.”

And damnit, Sebastian really has to try hard to hold back the sobs that threaten to spill out as the words bring him right back to that motorhome in Turkey in 2006.

_“You are amazing now, Sebastian. But you’re going to become spectacular once you grow older.”_

Kimi pulls back from the hug and shakes his head fondly at the emotions he sees on his friends face. Yes, Seb gets easily overly sentimental and Kimi knows that, so what? He tries to hide his sniffle, but it only makes Kimi grin wider, pulling Seb in for another hug. Seb wonders if he will get away with burying his head in Kimi’s neck and thinks _fuck it_ as he does just that, inhaling Kimi’s scent deeply, nuzzling the still sweaty skin.

When they finally separate again, Kimi rests his hand on Seb’s shoulder, giving it a squeeze and then keeping it there, creeping to the nape of his neck where he keeps a firm hold as he stares at Seb’s lips. Kimi does that a lot, probably without even being aware he’s doing it and it always makes Seb feel hot and wary at the same time, knowing Kimi wants him too but not really able to do anything about it. He’s made the decision to let it all play out like it’s supposed to in future Kimi’s 2020 world so he needs to be patient. He’s already waited this long, five more years will be easy. Or so he hopes, because having Kimi gazing at him like this, like he wants to eat him alive makes it very hard to not lean in and reacquaint himself with those lips.

But even though he is choosing to not act on this simmering thing between them and wait until 2020, it doesn’t mean he isn’t thinking about that night whenever Kimi looks at him like this. Just remembering the way future Kimi looked at him then, how much he wanted Seb, makes the German shiver under the current Kimi’s grip on his neck. It also doesn’t help that Kimi is starting to look more and more like his older version from the future. The more times seems to pass, the more he drives Seb absolutely bonkers with want. Kimi seems to snap out of his daze as he notices how Seb is squirming and the older man lets go of him as if his hand is suddenly burning. The Finn glances away, looking a bit embarrassed by being caught staring and then he plasters on his trademark grin, telling Sebastian to go celebrate now, he’ll join him later.

*

It’s a lot later when Sebastian finally gets to his hotel room. Ironically it’s the exact same room Britta had booked him two years earlier, when Mark had come on to him. He shakes his head, not wanting to think about that. He would much rather be thinking about the wonderful afternoon and evening he’d had. The celebration with the team and Kimi had been magical, with a lot of champagne and Italian singing. Seb had chosen not to get too drunk, though, because he doesn’t want to wake up tomorrow morning only to have fuzzy memories of today. That’s why he has also opted to retire to his hotel room not too late into the evening. It is only 10pm, enough time left for him to reminisce and reflect on the day while he takes a shower.

Kimi had acted like nothing happened during the celebrations, like he always did after he was caught staring at Seb a little bit too intensely. And Seb was fine with that, really. But sometimes he wishes it wasn’t all so complicated and complex. He just wishes he could act upon his feelings and that Kimi would finally have the balls to do the same. He hopes to god that all this waiting will be worth it in the end. What if it really was all just a dream and Seb got tricked into thinking it really happened? The fact that Kimi is in a serious relationship with a woman right now doesn’t really help with Seb’s insecurity. Of course he doesn’t expect Kimi to be celibate, the man doesn’t even know what happened between them yet and besides, Seb has been in relationships too. They were nothing serious, because he doesn’t let them get to that point. And while he has really tried from time to time, his heart belongs to Kimi and he’s come to find out there really isn’t room for anyone else in there.

He gets miserable just thinking about it, so he decides to think about something else instead.

The water clatters over him, washing away all the sweat and champagne that sticks on his skin. As he washes his body with a loofah that’s bubbling with soap, he skims over his dick and he’s not really surprised to find it half hard. Winning always makes him a little horny. Tonight is no exception, especially after Kimi’s lustful stares. An involuntary moan escapes his lips at the touch and he abandons the washing as he lets the loofah fall to the ground. He wraps his fingers around himself, teasing himself to full hardness in only a few loose lazy strokes.

Sebastian’s aroused mind searches for the perfect fantasy to focus on and he ends up thinking about Kimi entering him for the first time. It was hands down the hottest thing that had ever happened to Sebastian to date, it had been literal heaven for him and no amount of sex with any woman he’s had after that could come close. He hasn’t even bothered with men, because he knows they couldn’t _ever_ compare to his experience with future Kimi.

It’s been a while since he revisited this memory, because Sebastian knows how fast he will come if he lets it rule his mind and how desperate he gets for Kimi to be here with him. But Kimi clearly can’t, so what’s the point of torturing himself? So he closes his eyes and lets himself be swept away by the memories of being fucked by Kimi Räikkönen, indulging himself, even if it’ll cost him his sanity for a while.

*

“And I... I really want you to fuck me, Kimi.”

From the moment he had admitted that and had seen Kimi’s reaction to it, Seb absolutely couldn’t wait to have the older man inside of him. He has always known he likes men as well but before this crazy wild experience he’s never had the chance to do anything about it, or rather, he hasn’t had the guts to do so yet. There were fumbles with girls before, a handjob and some fingering here and there, but that’s all the experience he’s had so far. And this thing here with Kimi, it is all a little bit overwhelming to be honest but at the same time he is welcoming it eagerly. He’s been totally infatuated with Kimi’s younger version for ages, but Kimi from the future is so intoxicating, Sebastian can’t get enough of him.

The way the man is so sure of himself, completely in charge and teaching Seb patiently how to touch or blow him? It’s the hottest thing ever and it makes Seb feel so small and inexperienced but maybe that’s because he basically is. But Kimi doesn’t seem to mind, in fact it’s like he’s utterly thrilled to be the first to get to Seb like this and teach him all these things. And he no doubt enjoys the way Sebastian is so eager to please as he follows Kimi’s guidance and instructions so well. The German feels like he’s been blushing ever since they started this and sometimes he wants to disappear from the embarrassment but there’s no way he wants to miss out on any of this so he just goes along with everything. He wants Kimi _so_ much it almost hurts. And to know Kimi wants him just as bad is like every fantasy he’s ever had coming true all at once. The fact that this is Kimi, the guy he’s been crushing on ever since he started in F1 back in 2001, is just mind blowing and Seb has to resist the urge to pinch himself to check if this is really happening. He’s impatient to get on with this, but Kimi clearly wants to take his sweet time and Sebastian lets him. Kimi will know what to do and everything he’s done so far, Seb has absolutely loved. So he trusts the Finn to make it good for him. And he doesn’t disappoint.

It feels like ages before Kimi’s fingers are finally inside of him, but once the first finger breaches him, Seb feels like he’s floating. It feels amazing already and he tries to move his hips with Kimi’s fingers. Sure, he’s had his own fingers inside before, but that didn’t feel nowhere near as good as actually having someone else’s fingers inside, especially ones that knew exactly what and how to do it. Kimi’s gaze is fixed on him and as the Finn’s eyes are drinking him in, the older man does something with his fingers that make pleasure shoot up through his whole body, his vision whiting out for a moment. He has no idea what’s happening, the sensation utterly foreign but almost enough to make him come again. It’s completely overwhelming him as he feels his body shudder and spasm in Kimi’s strong hold. Aware he is making all sorts of desperate sounds, Sebastian tries to tone it down a little but it’s to no avail, they keep escaping against his will. When he dares a glance up at Kimi, he notices the man’s eyes getting darker at each sound that leaves his lips. It’s obviously turning Kimi on so Sebastian stops fighting them and just lets them on the loose, happy he’s found yet another way to please the older man.

“Kimi...oh god, Kimi,” he moans while he looks at Kimi with wide eyes, completely shattered as he feels his cock leak on his belly. Kimi’s dark eyes are traveling all over Seb’s body and it’s making the German shiver under his gaze, becoming more and more desperate as Kimi’s fingers keep grazing over that one spot. Sebastian feels his orgasm brewing up again, slowly creeping up on him and this time he’s aware of it enough to warm Kimi. He wants to come again on Kimi’s cock, wants to feel it hard inside of him and see if Kimi can hit that glorious spot again with his dick. And if he wants that to happen, Kimi has to stop what he’s doing now.

“Kimi, I’m... oh fuck, I’m-“

Immediately after he tries to utter the words, Sebastian feels the fingers leave his body and close around the base of his cock, preventing him from coming all over his own belly. Even though Kimi had stopped, which was exactly what Seb wanted, he still can’t help and whine for more. But Kimi is already kissing him deeply, obviously trying to distract him and well, it’s a good tactic. Seb feels himself slowly calm down again as he holds onto Kimi’s biceps tightly and the urge to come is ebbing away, making place for a pleasant buzz inside of him.

When Kimi pushes his fingers inside once more to check if he’s ready, Seb hears him ask, “are you ready, sweetheart?” and hearing Kimi use the endearment again makes his heart soar and wanting to keep the Finn close to him forever. There’s a brief moment where Kimi searches for a condom and it turns Sebastian on beyond belief that the man is so strict about the lube and now a condom, really putting Seb’s needs and safety first here. Thank goodness he finds one in his wallet, one from his own time in 2020. He shows it to Seb and while the German’s mind is blown, he also can’t wait to get on with it. His nerves are getting the better of him. He wants this, craves it even but he’s also scared, so he hopes Kimi will be careful with him. Not that Seb has any doubts, because the man has made sure everything he did to Sebastian so far was astonishingly amazing. But well, Kimi’s cock is quite impressive; it’s big and thick and Seb is worried if it’s even going to fit inside of him. So as he grabs onto Kimi’s back, Sebastian checks, just to be sure.

“Please, go slow?” he asks with a trembling voice as he feels the head of Kimi’s cock at his entrance. His heart feels like it’s about to beat right out of his chest, he’s so nervous but excited at the same time. It’s a weird combination of feelings, but Seb decides to just go with it.

“Of course,” Kimi whispers. “I’m going to make you feel so good, Sebastian. You’ll never forget this, I promise you.”

And Sebastian completely believes him. The thought of ever forgetting about this seems impossible now and Seb fleetingly wonders what he’ll do once this Kimi gets back to his own timeline. But before he has time to think about it some more, he feels the pressure of the head of Kimi’s dick popping inside. The feeling is incredibly intense, bordering on painful and Sebastian can’t help but whimper and squeeze his eyes shut as he breathes through the initial breaching. Once the shock has worn down a little, he concentrates on having a part of Kimi actually inside of him and just the thought alone fuels the fire that’s been brewing in him all evening again.

When he opens his eyes, he sees Kimi’s gaze fixed on him. Not really looking worried but he’s clearly watching Seb like a hawk to see if he’s not causing him any pain. It’s sweet, really and Seb appreciates it. He’s ready for more, though and he tries to show it by spreading his legs further, allowing Kimi in deeper. Kimi takes his time, sliding inside inch by inch and every time he shifts deeper Seb gets more and more overwhelmed with the blinding pleasure of it. It’s strange, he had expected it to hurt a lot more and while he can’t deny he’s struggling to handle the immense pressure, it mostly just feels incredible to have Kimi in him like this. Sebastian feels claimed and he finds that he _loves_ that feeling.

Once Kimi is all the way inside, he stills his hips, probably to let Sebastian get used to it. But then Kimi closes his eyes tightly while he tries to regulate his breathing and Sebastian realizes with a thrill that Kimi is having trouble keeping himself under control. The realization of this fact is so intoxicating and it delights Sebastian to no end that _he_ is able to do this to Kimi. As Kimi opens his eyes again to look at him, Seb can’t help but smile up at him.

And then Kimi shifts to kiss him and it makes his cock go even deeper, touching that unbelievable place again, but this time with the tip of his dick and it’s _amazing_.

“Ok?” Kimi whispers against his lips.

The man has no idea what he does to Sebastian doesn’t he?

“Kimi...” he hears himself pant as he tries to gather his thoughts, “I didn’t know-... it’s so good.”

Kimi begins to move within him, just slowly starting to fuck his cock in and out of Sebastian. It’s already more than he had ever imagined and the thought that this is Kimi, taking him like this, making sure Seb feels so good is making it all the more better. Kimi’s cock is hitting him in all the right places and every time he probes against Seb’s sweet spot, Seb feels a shudder go through him and he feels helpless against the onslaught of pleasure it brings him. The slow pace is maddening though and he wishes Kimi would go faster. He tries to tell him so, his lips moving but nothing comes out of his mouth except whiny moans and whimpers.

But then Kimi proves to be just as desperate for it as Seb is because he pleads, “Can I go faster?” He sounds like he’ll be losing it if Seb denies him and it only heightens Seb’s own desperation.

“Please. Yes, fuck me, bitte!”

The German plea slips out before he knows it, but he doesn’t pay it any attention, the only thing he’s focused on right now is for Kimi to fuck him harder and he’s completely shameless in his need. He works with Kimi as he feels him rearrange Seb’s limbs to the way he wants them to and he’s almost folded in half as the older man pushes Seb’s knees as far back as possible. Seb feels his face burning - though he is certain he’s already red in the face - if he thinks about the sight he must make now, spread out like an offering. To Kimi, he probably is. And strangely enough, Seb is totally on board with that idea.

No one could have prepared Sebastian for what happens next, because his world is about to be turned upside down as Kimi suddenly starts to really pound into him. The sensations are completely overwhelming as Kimi just hammers on his sweet spot with every deep, hard thrust in. His body moves with Kimi, or at least he tries to do so, but it’s like he has lost complete control over it and his voice because he can’t stop moaning and crying out. He’s shaking and trashing, but then he gets pinned down by Kimi while the man holds him down with his hands on the back of Seb’s thighs as he presses him into the bed firmly. The feeling of being restricted in his movements makes Seb feel helpless and it’s surprisingly only turning him on even more, this idea of being completely at Kimi’s mercy.

He’s completely disoriented when Kimi suddenly wraps his arms around Seb’s back as he rolls them over, with Kimi landing on his back and Sebastian on top of him. He just sits there, impaled on Kimi’s cock for a few seconds and then he wonders if maybe Kimi did this because he was so close to the edge already. Or maybe he just likes to see Seb being lost and asking for guidance. And the latter is just what is going on, because Seb has no clue what to do now.

“Kimi, w-what-?” Seb stutters out, breathless with the feeling of being so full and filled in this position. He wiggles about as he tries to get himself comfortable on top of Kimi and it causes Kimi’s cock to slide in even deeper, touching him just right. He cries out involuntarily as he feels his body shudder and his eyes roll back. _Fuck!_. This feels amazing, even better than when he was on his back. Seb places his hands on Kimi’s chest as he questioningly looks down at him, hoping it’s enough for Kimi to understand he’s asking for some guidance here.

“I want you to ride me, Sebastian,” Kimi tells him with a hoarse voice as his eyes practically devour Sebastian on top of him. “Take whatever you want from me. And however you want it. I’m all yours.”

_’Oh,’_ is all Sebastian can think. He feels a surge of insecurity go over him for a second. He’s never done this. How is he supposed to know how to do this? And what if he’s not good enough at it? What if Kimi doesn’t like the way Seb is going to ride him? It’s really a little intimidating to try and please a man who has so much experience already. But then he thinks of how Kimi has been so kind and patient with him all evening, never once judging Sebastian, even when he came prematurely into his mouth and when Seb almost choked himself on the Finn’s cock. So he tries to shove aside his uncertainty, determined to make himself and Kimi in the process feel good.

Sebastian moves himself over Kimi’s cock, trying to see which position works best for him and he moans when he feels the Finn’s throbbing cock move deliciously inside of him. He feels Kimi’s hands on his hips, not trying to guide him but just resting them there. It’s amazing how much power Seb has in this position - he can just move any way he wants as Kimi lets him experiment on top of him.

The position he settles on is amazing, it allows Seb to control exactly how he’ll take Kimi with every bounce of his hips and ass. He is leaning back, with his hands on Kimi’s knees as he arches his back every time he grinds Kimi’s cock against his pleasure spot. He even forgets about Kimi for a second as he breathes and moans uncontrollably, totally drowning in the sensations. He becomes a bit more aware of his surroundings when he feels his leaking cock jerk against his belly, doing this wild tango in the empty air. He never thought he could come without a hand on him but god, he knows now he was so wrong about that. He won’t need anything, just Kimi’s magnificent cock against his prostate is enough.

Looking down at his dribbling cock, Seb reaches out with his index finger as he swipes up the drops that have collected there. He blinks as he realizes what he’s done and he slows down his movements while he sits awkwardly on Kimi’s cock, having absolutely no clue what to do with the sticky finger. He’s about to shift his eyes to Kimi when the man under him suddenly grabs his hand and brings it to his lips, slipping Seb’s wet finger inside, licking and sucking the juices off of it. It’s not something Seb saw coming and he’s watching Kimi do it with wide, enthralled eyes. Kimi is so fucking sexy like that and Seb can’t believe he gets to do this with this man. He’s aware he’s looking like a gaping idiot, practically drooling as Kimi releases his finger with a pop, but there’s nothing he can do about it.

“Jesus, Kimi,” Sebastian pants, still dazed by the show Kimi had put on for him. A slap on his ass cheek shocks him into moving again and he feels his eyes get heavy with it, both appalled and pleasured by it. It certainly has the desired effect, because Seb finds himself moving again, resuming his rhythm. The little finger sucking episode has made him even hotter and it causes him to ride Kimi faster and it’s just so good, Sebastian doesn’t have any words to describe how good it is. There’s now way he can even talk right now anyway, all that comes out of his mouth are high moans and heavy pants.

Leaning forward with his hands placed on the bed next to Kimi’s head, Sebastian looks directly into Kimi's eyes and he’s sure the desire and need to come are very clear in his own. The friction his cock finds by rubbing against Kimi’s stomach is delicious and added with the constant pressure on his sweet spot is really becoming too much. Also, the way Kimi looks at him all the time? With his dark and hungry eyes that keep track of every movement and facial expression Sebastian makes? It’s fucking hot and empowering and it’s making the German very selfish as he concentrates on his own pleasure first. But Kimi doesn’t seem to mind, he obviously loves Seb riding him and he had told Sebastian to take whatever he wanted from him. So that’s exactly what he is doing. Still though, Seb can feel how much Kimi has got to restrain himself from not trusting up into the younger man.

Feeling himself start to clench around Kimi, Seb’s bouncing starts to falter the closer he gets and he goes completely quiet for a moment. His mind becomes a fuzzy mess, almost scared at the intense feelings that are racing through him and it’s completely shattering him as his orgasm takes over his whole body and mind. Seb throws his head back and he’s releasing the most embarrassing high little whines and moans but he’s floating in the air right now so he can’t find it in him to try and keep them in. Coming completely untouched, Seb’s pulsing cock is just spilling come everywhere and he keeps coming, even after he sits up straighter and starts to move again, chasing more of that mind blowing pleasure.

The strained feel in his thighs is beginning to burn him after a few seconds, so when he feels Kimi’s hand slide to his ass as he starts to slowly thrust up into Seb, the younger man feels relieved that he doesn’t have to do all the work on his own anymore. The massage his ass receives from Kimi’s big hands makes him tremble a bit and when Kimi spreads his cheeks and starts to slide in and out with long and deep strokes, Sebastian is moaning again. His eyes drink in Kimi, seeing him clearly now that the fog of chasing and getting his own orgasm has faded a bit and he looks unbelievable under Sebastian. The blonde hair is a total mess, sticking every which way and his eyes sparkle with so much pleasure and desire and it’s all directed right at Seb. The older man is groaning now every time he pounds in deep and Seb wants to try something, see if he can make the Finn lose his cool even more.

Tightening around Kimi deliberately, Seb watches with a filthy smile how it has the desired effect on the Finn. Because the older man growls dangerously and his eyes spit fire at Sebastian, demanding for him to do it again. And Seb aims to please, wants so desperately for Kimi to feel good and to think Seb is a good lover, so he does it again and again. He watches Kimi come undone beneath him and it’s honestly the best thing ever.

“Fuck Seb,” Kimi bites out. “Fuck, I’m gonna come.”

And oh god, Seb wants that. He wants Kimi to come and he wishes for a moment they had not used a condom because he longs to feel it all inside of him. But he brushes the thought aside, focusing on making Kimi come. He smiles at the man as his hands stroke over the Finn’s chest lovingly and he watches as goosebumps appear everywhere on that pale body.

“Yes, please come, Kimi, bitte,” he whispers pleadingly.

The sight of Kimi in orgasm is mesmerizing and there’s nothing in the world that could make Seb look away from the spectacle that’s unfolding right under him. Kimi’s hips are pushing up and he’s grinding his cock as deep as he can into Seb, his thrusts short and shocked. The knowledge that he is the cause of the Finn’s cock jerking and throbbing inside is surreal but it also makes Sebastian proud. Kimi is groaning loudly, the sounds sending thrills through Sebastian as he watches the pleasure wash over that handsome face.

As Kimi slowly comes down, he asks Seb if he’s ok. The younger man wants to laugh at the question. Ok? He feels like he’s on top of the world right now. He grins at Kimi as he nods and then he winces as the Finn spreads his cheeks and pulls out slowly. The feeling of being left empty a very unpleasant one.

*

Seb jerks, quite literally, back to reality as he feels the water lap over his face and hair, the drops falling quickly over his chest as they roll down all over his body. He’d completely lost track of time there for a while, lost in remembering his first time with Kimi. With a wry smile, he watches the evidence of his memory and orgasm dripping in long stripes down the wall as his come is washed away by the water, slowly disappearing into the shower drain.

_Just five more years._

~

**07.30.17.** _Budapest, Hungary._  
It’s a fucking miracle Seb wins this race with all the problems he’s had with his steering wheel and it’s frankly all because Kimi has kept the Mercedeses away from him. Had the Finn not done that, Sebastian would have been toast. The fact that Kimi had chosen to not overtake him while he could have easily done so, speaks volumes and it warms Seb’s heart. Ok, maybe there are some team orders involved too, but Kimi still did this for him even after what had happened in Monaco earlier this year.

He makes sure to go look for Kimi as soon as he can and he finds him sitting on a black chair, fumbling with his cap. Seb rushes towards him and leans down to clasp his hands with Kimi’s, looking into his eyes, smiling, as he says loudly, for everyone to hear, “thank you for not overtaking me.”

The bashful smile on Kimi’s face tells him everything he needs to know. They are ok and Kimi is genuinely happy for him. The relief is instant and he can’t stop smiling now. And as they step onto that podium together and celebrate, Seb is unable to stop taking glances at the Finn. He’s so mellow about it all, completely brushing aside the thing he has done for Seb as something small, but the German knows better.

When David is interviewing Valtteri, Seb goes to talk to Kimi in hushed tones and he knows he’s smiling like an idiot. He doesn’t know why he does it, but he suddenly reaches out and tries to grab onto Kimi’s hand and astonishingly, Kimi allows it and acts like it isn’t strange or weird at all. The touch shoots an electrifying thrill through Seb and it’s like he’s sharing a secret with the whole world without anyone knowing what it is about. Not even Kimi.

As his eyes take in Kimi, appreciating how gorgeous he really is and how much he looks like the Kimi he met in 2006, Seb suddenly gets reminded of what the older man had asked him that night in Turkey.

_“Do you want_ me? _Or do you want..._ him?”

It wasn’t a difficult question to answer then and it still isn’t now. Sebastian can’t help but think his younger self had been totally right to fall so hard for the older Kimi too. Because damn, this man is _fine._

~

**12.08.18.** _Saint Petersburg, Russia._  
Seb’s first instinct when he’d heard that Kimi’s contract wouldn’t be renewed was sheer panic, absolutely terrorized by the idea of Kimi maybe retiring from Formula 1 again. But then, as he had tried to rationalize it, he’d felt some sort of calm wash over him, remembering Kimi telling him he’s supposed to drive for the new Sauber team of Alfa Romeo. The relieving realization hadn’t meant he wasn’t still miserable about Kimi leaving Ferrari and not being his teammate next year though. His heart is absolutely broken about that fact because being Kimi’s teammate has been nothing short of amazing. But there’s no place for sadness tonight. They are at the FIA gala and it’s the last time Kimi is with him as his teammate and he’s going to enjoy it with every fiber of his being.

Sebastian has seen Kimi drunk so many times he’s lost count by now, but the state he’s in right at this moment is really something else. He has to practically carry Kimi from the stage and Seb can feel his cheeks burning. Not that he’s ashamed of Kimi, no, it’s the opposite. He loves Kimi like this a little too much, all carefree and clingy. The Finn is constantly touching Sebastian, lingering touches here and there and it’s fucking with his mind a whole lot.

It takes him a few tries, but he finally manages to convince Kimi to go back to the hotel where they are both staying. And when Kimi finally agrees, Seb breathes a sigh of relief. Because as much as he enjoys carrying Kimi around and making sure he doesn’t fall on his face, someone needs to protect Kimi’s reputation here. What’s left of it anyway after all these years of partying. Since Kimi’s relationship has stranded not too long ago, everyone expects Seb to be there and be Kimi’s keeper. Seb doesn’t mind, he just wishes Kimi would cooperate with him a bit more.

Usually, Kimi isn’t that overly friendly with the fans and prefers to keep his distance a bit. And fans usually don’t really approach him precisely because of this fact. But tonight Kimi seeks _them_ out. Just as they are about to get into the taxi, Kimi hears the fans yell his name and he tells Sebastian he’ll be right back. Rolling his eyes, Sebastian watches the older man approach the fans as he claps his hands and encourages them to make more noise. The German rubs a hand over his face, knowing it could be a while before Kimi gets back and into the car with him. He could easily leave him alone right now, go back on his own, but who’ll take care of Kimi and make sure he gets to his room safely then? The thought of anyone else doing it makes Seb’s blood boil so he endures the wait and watches somewhat amused how Kimi is greeting all the fans and is shaking their hands. And as much as he tries to be annoyed with the man, Seb feels his heart fill with warmth instead while he watches Kimi giving out autographs and trying on Russian hats.

*

“Aww Seb, don’t leave.”

Kimi has grabbed hold of Seb’s hand, preventing him from leaving. Just before that, Seb had just taken off the Finn’s shoes (with incredible difficulty he might add, Kimi kept swinging and stumbling) and brought him over to the bed. And now that Seb knows Kimi got here safe, it’s time to leave. But Kimi doesn’t seem to agree with that as he looks up drunkenly at Seb and holds his hand.

“Go to sleep, Kimi,” Seb tells him, still smiling and feeling his hand burning with the warmth of Kimi’s sweaty one.

“No Seb, please, stay,” Kimi whines, trying to sit up and pulling Seb with him on the bed, but his drunken body won’t allow him to. He’s spread out on the bed like a starfish, except for the hand that’s holding on tight to Seb’s. His eyes are pleading with Seb to stay and the younger man can’t resist them. Shaking his head amusedly as he sits down on the edge of the bed, Sebastian starts squealing as Kimi suddenly grabs him by the lapels of his jacket and pulls Seb in a lying position on his back next to him.

“Kimi, what are you doing?” Seb asks, giggling but feeling his heart race, too. Kimi plasters himself to Seb’s side, draping his legs and arms over the German as he nuzzles his neck. It makes Sebastian positively shiver, it’s so intimate and everything Seb’s wanted for the past 12 years. He is so absorbed into the feeling he doesn’t even hear Kimi’s mumbling at first, with the Finn’s lips that are moving wetly over his skin.

“Kimi?” Seb tries again, seeking to catch Kimi’s eyes. Once he succeeds, the older man looks at him with a drowsy gaze and the goofiest smile Seb has ever seen on him.

“You are so nice,” Kimi sighs, cuddling Seb even closer to him. It makes Seb laugh and he allows it for a moment, before he starts to pull away. Kimi makes a disgruntled sound, not ready to let go of Seb in the slightest and Seb closes his eyes for a moment, trying to get his wildly beating heart under control. It’s like that night in the cramped space of that single bed, them being plastered against each other with the only difference that they are still fully clothed now. Still, it triggers some deep longing and affection Seb has for this man. His nose wrinkles as he feels fingers stroke over his mustache and he opens his eyes to see Kimi looking at him intently, eyes half mast and the barely concealed desire clear in them. It sends a shockwave through Sebastian’s whole body. That gaze isn’t like the others he receives sometimes when he catches Kimi stare at his lips for example. No, this one is filled with blatant lust, love and yearning and Seb doesn’t know what to do with it.

“Kimi, wh-“

He doesn’t get to finish his sentence, because Kimi interrupts him as he slurs, “that mustache...” as his fingers keep stroking over the hairs above Seb’s upper lip.

Seb snorts again, glad to be distracted from the unbearable sexual tension. “What about it, Kimi?” He totally expects Kimi will make fun of it, probably thinks it’s ugly and looks ridiculous on Seb.

Kimi seems to struggle for words, but then a slow seductive smile forms on his face as he gets closer to Seb’s face, stare fixed at the German’s lips.

“It’s sexy,” Kimi whispers hoarsely.

Seb blinks. And blinks again. Did he hear that right?

“It’s what?” He doesn’t know why he’s whispering too, but it seems to be the mood to keep talking in low hushed voices so he goes with it. Kimi’s eyes shift to Seb’s and that suggestive smirk is still there.

“Your mustache is sexy. Turns me on.”

And then his lips are on Seb’s neck, licking the salty skin there and Seb’s heart is about to stop beating. He’s paralyzed for a second, the shock of having Kimi’s mouth on him like that like heaven and hell at the same time. Again, he allows it, because it’s too good not to. But the younger man also knows Kimi is pissed drunk right now and he most likely won’t remember anything in the morning. So, this has to be stopped. Right now.

He tries to pull away again, but Kimi is busy with sucking a nice big hickey into his neck and it makes Seb moan without his will. Resulting in Kimi being even more encouraged as he moves on to another spot on Seb’s neck to suck a new one there. Seb grabs hold of Kimi’s wrist as his hands start to wander all over the German’s body, stopping them on their journey and he gets that same disgruntled sound from earlier.

“You don wan dis, Seb?” Kimi slurs, his eyes barely open as they keep falling shut, sleep already pulling him in. The question makes Sebastian want to scream.

_Of course I do, you clueless idiot! You have no idea how much!_

But it’s best that those words go unsaid. For now. Instead he says gently, “shh, just go to sleep, Kimi. I’ll see you in the morning, ok?”

He slowly untangles himself from the now pliant Finn and finally gets out of bed. As soon as he has let go of Seb, Kimi seems to sleep like a log. How the older man ever thought he could start something with Seb here is hilarious. Seb doesn’t even think he could have gotten it up long enough for something significant to happen. It’s endearing and infuriating at the same time.

Signing affectionally, Seb bends over Kimi’s body and lets his fingers trail over the man’s cheek.

“Soon,” he whispers to the sleeping man. “Only two more years to go.”

~

**02.26.19.** _Barcelona, Spain._  
It’s the first testing day of the season and Seb is excited about it. Even though it’s strange not having Kimi by his side with Charles having taken his place instead. Don’t get Seb wrong, he likes the kid just fine as Charles is easy going and hangs onto every word Seb says to him. Charles is a bit shy around Seb still, clearly thinking about Seb like the hero he is in the young driver’s mind. Sometimes Seb forgets he’s the guy Michael used to be for him to these young drivers. Charles is obviously not Kimi though, and Sebastian misses the quiet but reassuring presence of the Finn.

Sebastian is about to get into the car but first he bends down to tighten the velcro band on his shoe. Midway in doing that, he gets distracted by someone in the garage yelling excitedly, “Kimi!” It makes Seb’s head shoot up as he stands again, completely forgetting about his shoe and he lets out an audible gasp as he sees his friend and former teammate step into the Ferrari garage.

It’s like Seb has time travelled himself, back to that night in 2006. Because here’s Kimi, looking exactly the same as he did in Turkey back then, with his Alfa Romeo cap on and the exact same shirt. It’s very disorienting and Sebastian can’t stop staring at Kimi as he drinks in the sight before him. Over the years, Kimi had become more and more like the man he had met thirteen years ago and it’s absolutely wild to see him in this gear because he looks like he just stepped right out of Seb’s very vivid memories. Seb can feel his eyes get a bit wet because it’s actually very emotional to see Kimi like this. It somehow reaffirms that the events in 2006 really happened and that his mind had not played tricks on him for all those years. Of course Seb still has the cap Kimi had left, so that had been conformation enough, but to see it come to life right before his eyes is a little crazy.

Sebastian watches as Kimi greets everyone in the garage and then makes his way over to the Finn when he notices that Kimi has spotted him. Or at least he tries to, because he forgot he had not properly put on his shoes yet. He trips and almost falls on the ground, but Kimi is there just in time to catch him. Seb looks up with gratitude and a watery smile on his face and it makes one eyebrow raise on the Finn’s face.

“You’re not still crying about me leaving Ferrari, right?” he jokes, referring to Seb’s wet eyes.

It takes Seb a little bit of time to respond, because Kimi’s hands on him when he looks like this is _very_ distracting. The hand on the small of Seb’s back feels like it’s burning holes right through his overalls while the other is causing tiny shivers as it grips the German’s bicep tightly.

If only Seb could reach out and kiss Kimi again. Touch him like the lovers they once were that one day so long ago.

The thought brings him back to the now and Kimi is very clearly still waiting for an answer, looking expectantly at Sebastian. So, Seb shoves him playfully and manoeuvres himself out of Kimi’s hold.

“The only thing I miss about you is your quietness.”

Kimi grins at him and says with a chuckle, “sure, Seb.”

“No really, I mean, Charles won’t shut up for even a minute.”

Shaking his head fondly, Kimi tells him good luck for the testing and walks away. The Finn looks back over his shoulder one more time just before he rounds the corner. The bright smile that the older man throws his way causes Sebastian’s heart to do all sorts of funny things in his chest.

The notion he’s going to see Kimi in his Alfa Romeo clothes every time he sees him on the grid now is going to be absolute torture. Because there’s nothing he can do about how it makes him feel. It’s going to be a long sixteen more months.

~

**11.15.20.** _Istanbul, Turkey._  
The alarm goes off, but Sebastian has been awake already for a very long time. He’s barely slept all night, just some moments dozing off when his mind would finally shut up for a brief period of time. He has waited fourteen years for this day and now that it’s finally here, he’s worried sick and the distress of not knowing what exactly is going to happen today is tormenting him greatly.

How will he know when to approach Kimi? What if Kimi doesn’t remember it? Or worse, what if Kimi thinks it was all just a crazy dream? And all those years waiting for him were all wasted?

All those questions swirl through his head as he finally drags himself out of bed, his legs jittery with nerves while he makes himself ready for the day. Just before he goes, he opens his suitcase and gets the almost sacred item that’s been traveling all over the world with him ever since Kimi had left it with him.

*

Seb doesn’t even know how he got to the track, it’s all one big blur, the thought of Kimi getting back from the past the only thing he can think about. He’s trying his best to pay attention to his engineers and the team, coming up with a strategy for the race ahead. It’s going to rain and Seb isn’t called _Regenmeister_ for nothing, so maybe there’ll be some opportunities here. The qualification yesterday hadn’t been that great with him qualifying on P12 and he probably could have done a little better, especially on a wet track, but the thought of Kimi had been getting the best of him. It has been a terrible year, the worst of Seb’s career and all the drama surrounding it was - as weird as it sounds - a welcome distraction. He barely had time to think about Kimi and this day, but the nerves had suddenly been there last week when he’d suddenly realized the date was coming really close now.

The nerves are coursing through his veins as his eyes keep shifting to what’s happening outside the garage. He excuses himself to his team, telling them he needs some fresh air and then he grabs his backpack as he quickly flees outside, leaving his team frowning and Charles a bit worried about his teammate. But he doesn’t care, he’s going absolutely crazy here and he can’t stand to be there for any longer, doing practically nothing. Every fiber of his being longs for Kimi to be here already, so he can look him in the eyes and see if something has changed in those icy blues.

Opening his backpack, he carefully pulls out the cap he’s been treasuring and studies it with a small smile. He wonders how Kimi will react when he sees it. Will he understand? Or will he think it’s just an ordinary Alfa Romeo cap and be confused as to why Seb is carrying it with him? Ugh, if only Kimi would finally show up. He knows the man is always taking his sweet time in arriving on the track, but he should have been here already. Seb takes another impatient look for the time at his phone when he spies something white and red in the corner of his eye.

His head snaps up, causing his neck to almost crack with the force of it and his eyes widen when he sees it’s Kimi. The Finn has a bewildered look on his face, as if he’s seen a ghost just before arriving here and it tears at Seb’s heart. There’s literally nothing in the world that can hold Sebastian back now. Before he knows it, he’s dropping his backpack to the ground and his feet start to move towards Kimi. First it feels like his legs are so heavy he can barely move at all. But once the realization has kicked in that this is really happening - _finally_ after all the waiting he’s endured - his feet carry him faster and faster and then he’s just running towards Kimi, the cap still held tightly in his hand.

Kimi doesn’t seem to see him coming at first, but at the last moment Seb sees surprise flickering on that face before the German jumps into his arms. Immediately he feels Kimi’s arms wrap around him tightly and it’s incredibly relieving that the older man is accepting this hug so readily, even if Seb isn’t sure yet if Kimi _knows_. They just stand there for a long moment, hugging and swaying slowly to a beat that isn’t there.

When Seb finally pulls back he looks deeply into Kimi’s eyes, searching for the truth. What he sees in them almost shocks him. The love, the longing and the disbelief of what happened to him is all reflecting back at Seb and the younger man _knows_ without a doubt that Kimi just came back from his trip from the past. The Finn looks shell shocked and just as terrified as Seb feels. Seb can’t believe it and without him even realizing it, his lips turn up into a soft, knowing smile as he looks back at Kimi.

Wordlessly, he hands over the cap to the older man. He watches as the emotion washes over Kimi’s face in stages. First there’s confusion, then brief doubt and disbelief. And finally there’s acceptance and hope forming in those expressive eyes as he looks up hesitantly at Seb.

Kimi is clearly having difficulty with keeping it together as he makes a noise that sounds like a sob and Seb gazes back at him with as much love as he can muster while he feels tears fill in his own eyes. The wait is finally over and he knows it’s been worth all the heartache he’s experienced for over fourteen years as he looks at the man he’s loved for so long.

“Welcome home, Kimi. I have been waiting for you.”

**Author's Note:**

> Please let me know what you think? 💕
> 
> Who knows, maybe I’ll write another piece one day and tell you what happened after the reunion.
> 
> My tumblr: [rainbowintheskyf1](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/view/rainbowintheskyf1)


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